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West Coast Poker Trip / Ramblings…
[Wrote 95% of this on the plane yesterday. In case anything seems off.]
I always seem to over-pack. No matter where I’m going or what I plan on doing, I constantly bring more than I ever use. Currently I am flying from Florida to Las Vegas then heading to California after that. I don’t think I over-packed, but time will tell. Haha. I am going to Vegas to play cash games along with the WSOP Circuit / Venetian events. After that I will make my way to Los Angeles for the LAPC. I might take a trip to San Jose for Bay 101 as well. That decision is similar to my over-packing debate. Time will tell! I’m excited to play a lot of poker over the next few weeks.
Recently, I started coaching an 8th grade AAU basketball team with my buddy Brian. It has been a great experience so far. I love basketball. More importantly then that is the fact that I get to interact with kids I can have a direct impact on. It is a process though. I am still getting to know them and how to handle each one. Dealing with different personalities is never simple, especially when coaching teenagers, but I will figure it out. We haven’t traveled to any tournaments yet. There were a couple scrimmages and a handful of practices. I can’t wait to travel for games with the team and see how we do. The only downside is that, due to my schedule, I won’t be able to attend every tournament. I don’t want to miss a thing. Unfortunately, I’ve already missed multiple practices and a scrimmage. But, fortunately for me, writing this paragraph makes me appreciate the opportunity even more. The glass is half full. Always.
In my last blog I talked about who I am, and who I want to become. The more time I spend thinking about this, the deeper it gets. It’s a black hole (in the positive sense.) There is no end to improvement, at least for me, in my eyes. I feel no limits. If I want to do something… I can do it. Hopefully that doesn’t come off as arrogant, but I truly believe that. I have lived it thus far. (I mostly blame my parents for this mindset, and a couple friends too. Thank you.)
Sometimes I feel I shouldn’t express myself too much, especially in my blog. Not because I feel it makes me vulnerable, but because it holds me accountable. Also, context is everything. It is difficult to transfer my thoughts to paper without losing something or someone along the way. If anything, I would like to be understood. I will definitely write more thoughts to the blog though. I’m about to ramble. Let me get back on topic…
Somewhere along the line I became lazy, complacent, settled, or just lost focus. There are COUNTLESS distractions in the world. I was letting myself get interrupted. I still will, but not as much. Hopefully I can recognize when it is happening and when I don’t want it to happen. I believe balance is key in life as well. But… If you are trying to get from point A to point B you shouldn’t stop too much along the way. Gas is expensive.
There are so many things I want to experience in my lifetime. Shit… I want to live long enough to have the opportunity to do so. Therefore, I better do my best to be healthy. That alone is a job in itself. This is an entry point into the black hole. Think of what you want to do, then think of all the things that can help you accomplish that goal. It is never-ending. You need a new hobby? Playing the piano has always interested you? Great. Buy a keyboard, take lessons, strengthen your fingers, learn how to read music, learn how to write music, make time for all these tasks (eliminate distractions), and the list goes on… You can never maximize your potential, ever. I know this isn’t a mind-blowing notion, but I think it is important to understand this concept. What do you want to do? How far are you willing to go?
This isn’t Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. You aren’t going to drink a Fizzy Lifting Drink and float to the top of the room where sharpened, spinning blades are waiting to dismember your body. My point is:
If you want to do something, JUST DO IT. It’s that simple. There is no ceiling. Figuring out what you want is the hard part. Getting from A to B should be the fulfilling part. It gives the end goal meaning. Even if you don’t make it all the way you still learned something, and hopefully enjoyed the ride. If you want to be the best, then try to be the best. If you want to have fun and enjoy yourself do that too. If you can control it, which most of us can, be happy.
Not everyone has some grand scheme or something they feel is monumental that they want to do with their life. That’s perfectly fine too. Everyone has to figure out what they want for themselves. We are all different. Find your own happiness, however that may come. That is the most important thing above all. If there is something you want to accomplish though, don’t let yourself get in the way, go for it.
Who Are You? Hold Up, Wait. More Importantly…
Hello world. I’ve been meaning to write this blog for WAY TOO LONG. There is a lot going on in my life right now. Mostly good things, some of which I plan on talking about in this post. Out of nowhere I received a message that inspired me to finally get my thoughts out:
“Tristan! ever had one of those moments where some crazy person unloads alot of strange information to you at weird timing? this will be one of those moments for you my friend. Brace yourself 
It all started my first day of 6th grade walking into mrs. newsoms class and i saw this blonde kid sitting down and thought “i already don’t like him!” and hoped I wouldnt be sitting near him. Well in Mrs Rao’s class (or whatever her name was) there i had to sit next to that kid that for some reason i didnt like. and then he had a name, Tristan. not too long after that I was prank calling him with ********* and having him ride his bike into my neighborhood. the next part is probably in the wrong order.
A little later Im spending the summer in Ohio and instant messaging ******…you’ve never explained that screenname… anyway it was that summer that i remember spending the majority of my time on AIM talking to you. I clearly remember that summer bc you said something to me along the lines of that you liked me, and you knew i liked you and you called me out saying i was too afraid to admit it. funny, because i remember all these teenage emotions going through me as I realized, oh Lord he’s right. but of course i tried to keep convincing myself it wasnt true. i have a point. heres my point…I think people go their whole lives without hearing how special they are so I thought of you and decided you have to know.
You’ve never been unnoticed in my book. how nice you were to me through those awkward middle school days, how in high school you drove to bring me school stuff and lurked around outside peering in windows to find my apt, how you hit the splint off my broken finger in middle school while we were playing cards, seeing you on the bus on the way to st augustine, you coming to my graduation party, sitting like a wallflower at my sweet 16 party but getting up when i forced you to dance, seeing you on separate occasions with both of my exboyfriends and you still being wonderful after i wasnt to you, watching you get confirmed- or whatever it was that we did, noticing you always through school. so you were noticed and i know not only by me. why i never said anything to you then?? duh because i was dumb and chicken. For some reason i felt it was necessary to let you know all this now.
What im basically trying to say, is tristan you are amazing. i had a great time growing up with you and you are probably one of the only real men ive ever met. hopefully a lifelong friend for me. im not sure where you are at in your life (love to hear about it) but, I hope you are doing well because you deserve only good things. Im hoping you are picky in your love life and will not settle for anything but outstanding because you can have the world. Not sure if I will ever run into you again but if not, congrats as ive heard bits and pieces that you are doing great in your career. Anyway, update me with how your life is!– that is if my crazy explosion didnt scare you…
p.s. im really not as nutty as this sounds. if you’re anything like me, i’d probably get all uncomfortable reading this. but, this wasnt intended to weird you out, just to inform you , you’re great :-)”
Wow… Honestly, I have no idea what to say. Even after reading this letter over and over and over again, it is still tough to digest. I could write about a million feelings or thoughts that stem from reading this heartfelt confession. However, I’ll be keeping most of those sentiments to myself. The first thought that comes to my mind is that I made an incredible impression on someone without necessarily trying to. This reflection is essential for my entry.
The most important thing I have focused on over the last few months is working on myself. Not just who I am as a person, but who I want to be. This sounds easy right? I’ve realized it’s not. The difficult thing about change is that you have to figure out the end goal before you can start the process. I am still trying to determine exactly WHO I WANT TO BE. What qualities do I want to possess? How should I carry myself? What do I want to accomplish? How can I positively impact the world? How do I want to be perceived? Personally, what do I expect out of me?
I don’t care what most people think about me. I know who matters and what opinions I should respect. This is crucial when determining who you want to be. You can’t be scared to be yourself. Embrace being unique. Use the judgement of people you trust to help shape the person you want to become. If you have the right intentions, coupled with the views from those that you adore, then you should have a much easier path to changing for the better. This is where I stand.
I’m not sure what happened to me over the years. Did I lose a sense of the person I want to be? Was I exposed to the real world? The fact that you can’t be so naive and innocent. I’ve been burned plenty of times throughout my life, but with all the negativity I’ve been exposed to, there has been much more positivity along the ride. I probably have subconsciously been changing who I am without really thinking about it. People alter so much over their lives. We go through countless life experiences that constantly shape us. You have to be able to take a step back sometimes and get a different perspective. We are in control. You are in control. Don’t ever forget that.
Back to my point. It appears that earlier in my life I was someone I wanted to be without really making an effort towards it. I’m sure I wasn’t perfect (nor will I ever be), but I think I was closer to who I wanted to be back then. Now, after years of maturity, I am back to square one. I am okay with this revelation. My outlook has changed and my perspective has been skewed because of my experiences. I can only use the knowledge I’ve gained over the years to help shape who I want to become in the end.
It isn’t an easy task, but I look forward to the challenge of figuring out who I want to be, and then actually becoming that person. I’m sure my mindset will continue to change over time. As long as I keep myself in check and focus on the person I want to become, I think I will be a lot happier with the person I am. Maybe this entry can help you do the same. Cheers.
EVERYONE Should Watch This…
This is an amazing video. It relates decision making in poker to making choices in life. It’s nothing ground breaking but I think people who don’t know much about poker will be able to understand the concept. It’s a cool video regardless, check it out.